While we’ve started having discussions about end-of-life care and Soraya’s wishes, I hadn’t really thought about what that would look like for the rest of my family until recently.

It’s time to get real. We had a wonderful Hawaii trip AND there were some hard, sad moments.

I am learning that anticipation doesn’t make the pain of the loss go away, and things that I didn’t even realize could make me feel so sad absolutely CAN.

SURPRISE!!! Soraya and our family won the 2024 National Lori Schultz-Betancourt Indomitable Spirit Award from Make-A-Wish America!

Soraya’s nights have been filled with deep thoughts, isolation, and loneliness recently…

After such an emotional week, it’s been good to think about what keeps us going as a family. One of the most helpful ways we have learned to put one foot in front of the other is therapy.

This disc with the chemical powder that magically dries the g-tube site and allows Soraya to heal is INCREDIBLE. Soraya is in less pain and we are now able to use a Farrell Bag—meaning we can sleep in more than 2-hour chunks!!!!

Friday marks November 1st, and my bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction is on December 11th. Reality has set in and I’m deep in planning mode while also trying to process some unexpected (and frankly scary) news I got about my health last week…

Halloween is under a week away and I am finally acknowledging that things are so different now than they used to be. It doesn’t feel the same, and we’ve needed to make a lot of changes to how we celebrate to come close to resembling past holidays.

What have been some of the best ways you’ve seen loved ones honored? Is there anything you’ve seen done for others who have passed that you’d like to one day be done for you?

Cheryl Strayed once wrote, “Acceptance is a small, quiet room.” I am so grateful to have such great friends to join us in ours.

It takes a lot of work to do Soraya’s care. Here’s a look at a night of caring for her.

My original plan was to tell Soraya about my mastectomy a week before the surgery. However, she had other plans!

It’s strange to go to all the cancer centers and meet all the cancer doctors when I DON’T have cancer. I feel like I don’t really belong.

I wanted to tell Yasmeen and Leena as soon as possible. With their personalities, I knew having the time to process and prepare would help ease their anxiety.

While many times Soraya stays quiet due to her fatigue, there’s a storm of thoughts behind that facade. She’s shared with Safi and I that the thought of dying is constant. She feels her body getting weaker and now she is really missing the person she used to be...

I’m quite decisive if I have facts and a decision-making matrix. It didn’t take long after my second surgical consult to know how I wanted to move forward and start putting that plan into motion.

I was originally going to have to wait two weeks after my first reconstructive surgeon consultation before I could get in for the second consult. Waiting turned out to be a LOT harder than anticipated.

The Andy Grammer concert was filled with poetry, personal stories from the audience, acoustic music, connection, and love. Truly a sermon for my soul.

We are SO excited to see Andy Grammer in concert in 2 days! Our whole family loves Andy. His music has gotten us through our darkest times and given us our BEST memories.