Sibling Caretaking: It’s Not All or Nothing
Speaking of siblings being involved in caretaking (or not)... without prompting, Leena recently asked if she could learn how to administer water through the g-tube for Soraya!
Safi and I were shocked by this, as we’ve tried to shield Leena from any pressure to care for Soraya. We’ve been very cautious about this because we do not want to create the opportunity for potential resentment to grow.
Sure, we have household chores that are caregiving adjacent—like washing and oiling our medical syringes—but we have made a conscious effort not to require chores that directly involve Soraya’s care.
However, it looks like these two chatted during their “bestie nights” (aka when Leena sleeps over in Soraya’s room). They dreamed about Leena being Soraya’s nurse someday… and Leena is excited for this step.
Right now, Leena just wants to give Soraya water through her g-tube (no meds), and that’s ok! It does not have to be all or nothing.
And if she changes her mind sometime in the future and no longer wants to learn about/help with Soraya’s g-tube needs that’s fine too!
My job as a parent is to empower them with the CHOICE to participate in caregiving or not, as there is so much about our life they do not get a choice in. And as I shared in my post two days ago, siblings can support the family and their affected sibling in numerous ways outside of direct caregiving ❤️